On people

And another month goes by

I like to think of life as a canvas painted in different colors by the different people we meet, from strangers we bump into people with whom we share our deepest moments of intimacy. Vibrant and dull. 

And i like to think of people as the different colors shaping our painting, with different hues adding depth and richness. Each infuses our lives with different shades of memories, emotions, and experiences. 

Friends come in different colors and shades. Yellows and greens. Each friend brings a unique perspective and energy to our lives. Some offer us emotional support or sound advice; some offer us all the fun that life has to offer or share inside jokes with us, and others are the ones we seek when we want to sit in comfortable silence. 

I thought about what color should symbolyse family, and by the end of it i couldn't decide. Family dynamics vary from culture to another and even within the same culture it varies from a person to another. So, i concluded that family can take on a different color depending on ones experience. But, neverthelss it remains the base coat we start our painting on. They weave through the fabric of our existence, painting our past and quite possibly our future.

I always like to think of our romentic partners in the cliché red, the color of passion and love and the color purple maybe even different shades of blues. They provide us companionship and unique colors that enriches our painting with love and intimacy.

In all honesty, i don't see much difference between our romantic partners and friends aside from sexual intimacy, but even that can be achieved with another type of friend (sorry for rumbling here), but i still think they add distinct colors to us. 

Beyond the inner circle we keep of friends, family, and lovers, there are different hues of colleagues and acquaintances who pass through our lives at different stages. These encounters, fleeting as they might be, introduce us to different shades we might not have considered before. Like teamwork, navigating the professional world, new ideas and perspectives, and new cultures. Each encounter brings a different shape and color to our palette.

But above all, we must all remember relationships are not static. Some people come into our life in vibrant hues, their color belnding harmoniously with ours. They stay, their pigment never fading no matter time, distance, and hardship we face in our relationship with them.

And some just brush us by and leave, gradually fading away, their once bold pigmented colors now a mere faint hue in the background. Yet, that paint left from their presence remainds us that even fleeting encounters contributes to the artistry of our journey.

As we navigate the myrad of colors of life, and build our ever evolving, ever changing palette of life, we must learn to apperciate and cherish the colors that stayed with us and recognize the beauty of those who gently drifted away. For that both of those contributed their own unique color, creating and shaping our life's portrait.

Yeah yeah, a gentle breeze,
People that brush by,
People that soak into my heart,
What kind of person am I?

The above is a verse from Agust D's song People from D-2. He starts the song by comparing people to a gentle breeze, some just brush by, and some seep into the heart. And then he reflects on himself. And that's where i'm now.

Since i'd like to think of people as colors, what kind of color am I? Do i represent different colors for different people? What kind of person am I? In the middle of all these people coming, staying, or leaving and these changes, who am i truly?

Am i only the clothes i wear, the degrees i have, the jobs i'm employed at, and the coffee shops i frequent? Does this self of mine consist only of the things i own or the people i interact with? Am i only the sum of external factors? Or maybe i'm only the sum of internal gears working inside of me? Am i both or neither?

Am i a good person? Or a bad person? The assessments are all different. I'm just a person.

Regardless of all those metrics and much more, i remain just a person. As a person who can't stop these events from unfolding, sometimes i will have to carry the weight of meeting those colorful people, and other times i carry the joy of having met them.

Until i possess a different answer or a more definable one, I'm simply a human, as a human can be.

For book recommendation, i would suggest The Setting Sun by Osamu Dazai. 

That's it for today. Make sure to take good care of yourself, stay healthy, and make good choices.

I will see you another time,
Fatima.